Archive for the ‘struggle’ Category

stolen affections

Posted: 2011/07/16 in family, joy, struggle
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I think I am watching the innocence of my children leaving.  Some may read this in a negative light, I just think it’s part of growing up.  In many, and probably most ways, my kids have the heart of a child but today I sat in my living room just watching my kids talk about popular pop songs.  My kids are 7, 6, and 4, and when they’re talking about what pandora station they want to listen to and their choices include artist like Bieber, Ke$sh, and Bruno Mars, I am slowly watching other things compete for the affections of my children (no, I’m not one that things non-christian music is from the devil).  I strongly desire my kids to love the Lord with all their heart, soul, mind and strength.  I want the cross to be the center of their life and change their heart and their outlook on everything.  I want Jesus to be the thing that radiates from their being.

This is what I know, I am never going to be able to “protect” them from things that have the intent of robbing them from the joy that is only found in Christ.  Part of maturity and part of growing up is being able to see these things and choosing Christ by the grace of God.  Stacy and I have a plan on what song’s are appropriate for our kids.  In this tiny scope of realty (which this issue is not about music), as terrible as some songs are, we know that the true and most dangerous “affection robbers” come not just in the obvious, but in the obscure.

I see the need stronger than ever to find consistent family worship, things that continually point us to the cross of Jesus, because if I’m lazy as their parent, it could be deadly in the end.  Jesus protect them and save them, lead me as I seek to lead them!



Posted: 2009/02/28 in Austen, christianity, sin, struggle
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how do you teach a 5 year old repentance?


i don’t know if my heart has ever been so broken.  Austen has entered into this phase of his life where he knows all the right answers when he is in trouble but the look on his face is so blank.  he got in big trouble yesterday for a rebellious act.  we “discussed” it.  today he got in trouble for the same thing…twice.  dumb.  he doesn’t get it.  tonight (the last time) when he got busted he knew it was bad…but his “sorry” never left the stage of “crap, i just got caught.”  can you teach a kid to have a repentant heart?  am i able to teach him that being sorry is not about the trouble you’re in or about how “firm” i am.  the most emotion i got tonight was when he started crying because i got firm with him.  dude, it’s not about how disappointed i get!  it’s about being sorry that you broke your mom’s and my heart bro.  it about loosing trust.  it’s about never wanting to go down that road again.  

i can not change his heart.  only God can change his heart.  i can love him, teach him about sin, embrace him, teach him about the glorious things about God…but i can’t change him.  

God save my little boy.  change him from the inside out.  break his heart when he breaks ours.  God teach me the same thing about my own sin in how it breaks your heart.  thank you for allowing me to struggle through this only to teach me about “a Fathers love for me.”  

I love you Jesus!